This is from the Matthew Shepard Foundation newsletter.. we should all read this ... it is time for ACTION!!....
Our family, and the staff and board at the Matthew Shepard Foundation, are all deeply saddened by the devastating report of at least the fourth gay or gay-perceived teen to commit suicide in this country in the last month.
Reports say that Tyler Clementi, 18, leapt to his death from the George Washington Bridge near his New Jersey college campus after a roommate allegedly broadcast him in a same-sex encounter behind closed doors in his dorm room, and apparently invited others, via Twitter, to view it online. Regardless of his roommate’s alleged tweet, Tyler had apparently made no statement about his own sexual orientation. I’m sure we will all learn more about this terrible tragedy as legal proceedings unfold, but the contempt and disregard behind such an invasion of privacy seems clear. In the meantime, we send our thoughts and prayers to Tyler’s family as they mourn their loss.
In the last month there has been a shocking series of teen suicides linked to bullying, taunting, and general disrespect regarding sexual orientation, in every corner of America. Just a few days ago, Seth Walsh, a 13-year-old in Tehachapi, Calif., passed away after 10 days on life support after he hanged himself. Police say he had been mercilessly taunted by fellow students over his perceived sexual orientation.
Billy Lucas, 15, hanged himself a few weeks ago at his Indiana home after years of reported harassment by students who judged him to be gay. Asher Brown, a 13-year-old in Harris, TX, who had recently come out, took his life with a gun after, his parents say, their efforts to alert school officials to ongoing bullying were not acted upon.
Many Americans also learned this week about Tyler Wilson, an 11-year-old boy in Ohio who decided to join a cheerleading squad that had been all-female. As a gymnast, he was interested in the athletic elements of cheering. He was taunted with homophobic remarks and had his arm broken by two schoolmates who apparently assumed him to be gay. He told “Good Morning America” that since returning to school, he’s been threatened with having his other arm broken, too.
Our young people deserve better than to go to schools where they are treated this way. We have to make schools a safe place for our youth to prepare for their futures, not be confronted with threats, intimidation or routine disrespect.
Quite simply, we are calling one more time for all Americans to stand up and speak out against taunting, invasion of privacy, violence and discrimination against these youth by their peers, and asking everyone in a position of authority in their schools and communities to step forward and provide safe spaces and support services for LGBT youth or those who are simply targeted for discrimination because others assume they are gay. There can never be enough love and acceptance for these young people as they seek to live openly as their true selves and find their role in society.
Suicide is a complicated problem and it is too easy to casually blame it on a single factor in a young person’s life, but it is clear that mistreatment by others has a tremendously negative effect on a young person’s sense of self worth and colors how he or she sees the world around them. Parents, educators and peers in the community need to be vigilant to the warning signs of suicide and other self-destructive behaviors in the young people in their lives, and help them find resources to be healthy and productive. We urge any LGBT youth contemplating suicide to immediately reach out to The Trevor Project, day or night, at (866) 4-U-TREVOR [866-488-7386].
Judy Shepard
President, Matthew Shepard Foundation Board of Directors
This is the continuing story of Teddytoy and my family. Remember to Pay It Forward.. Some links may take you to adult material...if you aren't mature enough please move on.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Today I received an e-mail condemning a certain religious belief it came from a 'christian' person It claimed that the muslims were trying to take over the US...competition for the mormons and right wing christian groups that are trying to do the same thing.....my response was...
remember the background of the Catholics... the Crusades or the Inquisition which killed anyone that didn't believe ... the so called christian groups such as the KKK that kills people of different races and the 'Kill a Queer for Christ' group of the Late Mr. Falwell's organization among others. As far as taking over America .. look no further that Utah... the Mormons' are working on that now.
The Constitution of this great land is very clear on the separation of Church and State. The government can not establish a religion nor can a religion run the government. There is NO official religion of the US. Everyone is free to believe or not believe what ever they choose. I am not saying that any one religion is better or worse than any other Muslim, Mormon, Catholic, Protestant, Judaism, Hindu or Wiccan or any other of the thousands of belief systems. In this country they are all equal and forcing any one on the rest is against the constitution and very Anti-American. To say that any one religious belief is more 'patriotic' that the others is against the very reason this country was founded. Your ancestors came here to escape religious persecution unless they were brought as slaves
Also, take a look at discrimination in this country... it is almost always rooted in the "christian church" .. Women, Jews, African Americans, hippies, gays and now muslims. There has to be an 'Enemy of the Church' for the church to grow and recruit members.
If this offends you... please read the Constitution as well as the bible ... if you belive in it... not part but all of both. The bible says "let he who is without sin cast the first stone' as well as "judge not unless you will be judged. If you claim to be patriotic support our freedoms... all of them. If you believe in a God .. thank the writers of the constitution for giving you the right to believe in the God of your choice and to worship as you wish, or the right not to.
remember the background of the Catholics... the Crusades or the Inquisition which killed anyone that didn't believe ... the so called christian groups such as the KKK that kills people of different races and the 'Kill a Queer for Christ' group of the Late Mr. Falwell's organization among others. As far as taking over America .. look no further that Utah... the Mormons' are working on that now.
The Constitution of this great land is very clear on the separation of Church and State. The government can not establish a religion nor can a religion run the government. There is NO official religion of the US. Everyone is free to believe or not believe what ever they choose. I am not saying that any one religion is better or worse than any other Muslim, Mormon, Catholic, Protestant, Judaism, Hindu or Wiccan or any other of the thousands of belief systems. In this country they are all equal and forcing any one on the rest is against the constitution and very Anti-American. To say that any one religious belief is more 'patriotic' that the others is against the very reason this country was founded. Your ancestors came here to escape religious persecution unless they were brought as slaves
Also, take a look at discrimination in this country... it is almost always rooted in the "christian church" .. Women, Jews, African Americans, hippies, gays and now muslims. There has to be an 'Enemy of the Church' for the church to grow and recruit members.
If this offends you... please read the Constitution as well as the bible ... if you belive in it... not part but all of both. The bible says "let he who is without sin cast the first stone' as well as "judge not unless you will be judged. If you claim to be patriotic support our freedoms... all of them. If you believe in a God .. thank the writers of the constitution for giving you the right to believe in the God of your choice and to worship as you wish, or the right not to.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Showing Gay Teenagers a Happy Future
This is from the NY TIMES ...
September 22, 2010, 2:46 pm
Showing Gay Teenagers a Happy Future
By TARA PARKER-POPE
A new online video channel is reaching out to teenagers who are bullied at school for being gay. The message: life really does get better after high school.
The YouTube channel, called the “It Gets Better Project,” was created by the Seattle advice columnist and activist Dan Savage. Mr. Savage says he was moved by the suicide of Billy Lucas, a Greensburg, Ind., high school student who was the target of slurs and bullying. The channel promises to be a collection of videos from adults in the gay community who share their own stories of surviving school bullying and moving on to build successful careers and happy home lives. The first video shows Mr. Savage with his partner of 16 years, Terry. The men tell their own stories of being bullied, finding each other and becoming parents. This week I spoke with Mr. Savage about the new channel and why he decided to reach out to teenagers. Here’s our conversation.
Q.Why did you decide to create a YouTube channel to talk to gay teenagers?
A.There was another suicide of a teenager, a kid who was being harassed for being gay. I put up a link to the story, and someone said in a comment that they wished they could have talked to the kid for five minutes to tell him it gets better. That’s always been my reaction too. I realized that with things like YouTube and social media, we can talk directly to these kids. We can make an end run around the schools that don’t protect them, from parents who want to keep gay kids isolated and churches that tell them that they are sinful or disordered.
Q.Aren’t celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres and Adam Lambert already showing teenagers that it’s O.K. to be gay?
A.They see Ellen and Adam Lambert and Neil Patrick Harris. They’re good folks and important public figures, but those are gay celebrities. What are the odds of becoming a celebrity? What kids have a hard time picturing is a rewarding, good, average life for themselves. Becoming Ellen is like winning the lottery. But there are a lot of happy and content lesbians who we don’t see or hear from ever. Those are the people teens need to hear from right now. When a 15-year-old kills himself, he’s saying he can’t picture a future that is decent enough and happy enough to stick around for. Gay adults can show our present lives and help them picture a future.
Q.The video advice you offer kids is to just hang in there. Why aren’t you telling them that you can help them now?
A.We can’t help them. That’s what makes gay adults despair and feel so helpless when we hear these stories. We can’t barge into these schools. I get to go to colleges and speak, but high schools don’t bring me in, and those are the ages that young gay people are committing suicide. I’ve read these stories for years. Because of technology, we don’t need to wait for an invitation anymore to speak to these kids. We can speak to them directly.
Q.You’re an advice columnist who writes about other people’s issues. Was talking about your personal and family life difficult?
A.It made me more self-conscious. I don’t write about my life in my column. It was difficult. It’s going to be difficult for a lot of people. You can see people revisiting this part of their lives that they wanted to forget about. I don’t like to think about what school was like for me. It kills me when Terry talks about it because he suffered so much. The thing that was also difficult, we didn’t want to seem like we are bragging, but we wanted to talk about the things that are good and meaningful and give us joy, like going snowboarding or going to Paris. We don’t want to seem elitist. And we didn’t want to wallow in pain. We want to give kids hope for a future life that has pleasure and joy and family.
Q.How is the channel going to work?
A.We want people to post their own videos and send me a link. I can select them and add it to the page. The Web site is www.YouTube.com/ItGetsBetterProject. It’s going to be interesting to see what comes in. I don’t want it to be “lifestyles of the gay and fabulous.” What we want to say to kids is that if you don’t win the economic lottery, and most people don’t, you can have a good and decent and fun life that brings love.
Q.The first line of your video is, “High school was bad….” What kinds of things did you and your partner have to deal with in high school and middle school?
A.It was late grade school that was hard for me. I was really different, my head was in the clouds. I liked musicals. I didn’t make friends or hang out with people. Then I found theater. I got picked on a lot, even by teachers too. I liked to listen to musicals and bake, and my homeroom teacher found out and mocked me in front of the whole class for baking. I got beat up a couple of times in the schoolyard. It’s nothing compared to what Terry went through. He was beat up every day, stuffed into bathroom stalls. He could barely walk down the halls without being attacked. His parents went and spoke to the administrators and were told that they wouldn’t do anything so long as he insisted on acting the way he acted and walking the way he walked and talking the way he talked, and he was bringing it on himself.
Q.Would hearing from gay adults that your life eventually would get better have helped you back then?
A.It did help me. When I was in high school I got involved in the fringe theater scene in Chicago, and I met some openly gay people. I could see that it got better, that they were happy and loved and supported. I saw with my own eyes that it got better.
Q.Have you heard from any teenagers yet since posting the first video this week?
A.I’ve heard from bunches. I’ve gotten 3,000 e-mails in the first 24 hours. The ones that are really moving are the ones from straight kids who are telling me that they are e-mailing the link to their picked-on gay classmates and friends who need to see it.
September 22, 2010, 2:46 pm
Showing Gay Teenagers a Happy Future
By TARA PARKER-POPE
A new online video channel is reaching out to teenagers who are bullied at school for being gay. The message: life really does get better after high school.
The YouTube channel, called the “It Gets Better Project,” was created by the Seattle advice columnist and activist Dan Savage. Mr. Savage says he was moved by the suicide of Billy Lucas, a Greensburg, Ind., high school student who was the target of slurs and bullying. The channel promises to be a collection of videos from adults in the gay community who share their own stories of surviving school bullying and moving on to build successful careers and happy home lives. The first video shows Mr. Savage with his partner of 16 years, Terry. The men tell their own stories of being bullied, finding each other and becoming parents. This week I spoke with Mr. Savage about the new channel and why he decided to reach out to teenagers. Here’s our conversation.
Q.Why did you decide to create a YouTube channel to talk to gay teenagers?
A.There was another suicide of a teenager, a kid who was being harassed for being gay. I put up a link to the story, and someone said in a comment that they wished they could have talked to the kid for five minutes to tell him it gets better. That’s always been my reaction too. I realized that with things like YouTube and social media, we can talk directly to these kids. We can make an end run around the schools that don’t protect them, from parents who want to keep gay kids isolated and churches that tell them that they are sinful or disordered.
Q.Aren’t celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres and Adam Lambert already showing teenagers that it’s O.K. to be gay?
A.They see Ellen and Adam Lambert and Neil Patrick Harris. They’re good folks and important public figures, but those are gay celebrities. What are the odds of becoming a celebrity? What kids have a hard time picturing is a rewarding, good, average life for themselves. Becoming Ellen is like winning the lottery. But there are a lot of happy and content lesbians who we don’t see or hear from ever. Those are the people teens need to hear from right now. When a 15-year-old kills himself, he’s saying he can’t picture a future that is decent enough and happy enough to stick around for. Gay adults can show our present lives and help them picture a future.
Q.The video advice you offer kids is to just hang in there. Why aren’t you telling them that you can help them now?
A.We can’t help them. That’s what makes gay adults despair and feel so helpless when we hear these stories. We can’t barge into these schools. I get to go to colleges and speak, but high schools don’t bring me in, and those are the ages that young gay people are committing suicide. I’ve read these stories for years. Because of technology, we don’t need to wait for an invitation anymore to speak to these kids. We can speak to them directly.
Q.You’re an advice columnist who writes about other people’s issues. Was talking about your personal and family life difficult?
A.It made me more self-conscious. I don’t write about my life in my column. It was difficult. It’s going to be difficult for a lot of people. You can see people revisiting this part of their lives that they wanted to forget about. I don’t like to think about what school was like for me. It kills me when Terry talks about it because he suffered so much. The thing that was also difficult, we didn’t want to seem like we are bragging, but we wanted to talk about the things that are good and meaningful and give us joy, like going snowboarding or going to Paris. We don’t want to seem elitist. And we didn’t want to wallow in pain. We want to give kids hope for a future life that has pleasure and joy and family.
Q.How is the channel going to work?
A.We want people to post their own videos and send me a link. I can select them and add it to the page. The Web site is www.YouTube.com/ItGetsBetterProject. It’s going to be interesting to see what comes in. I don’t want it to be “lifestyles of the gay and fabulous.” What we want to say to kids is that if you don’t win the economic lottery, and most people don’t, you can have a good and decent and fun life that brings love.
Q.The first line of your video is, “High school was bad….” What kinds of things did you and your partner have to deal with in high school and middle school?
A.It was late grade school that was hard for me. I was really different, my head was in the clouds. I liked musicals. I didn’t make friends or hang out with people. Then I found theater. I got picked on a lot, even by teachers too. I liked to listen to musicals and bake, and my homeroom teacher found out and mocked me in front of the whole class for baking. I got beat up a couple of times in the schoolyard. It’s nothing compared to what Terry went through. He was beat up every day, stuffed into bathroom stalls. He could barely walk down the halls without being attacked. His parents went and spoke to the administrators and were told that they wouldn’t do anything so long as he insisted on acting the way he acted and walking the way he walked and talking the way he talked, and he was bringing it on himself.
Q.Would hearing from gay adults that your life eventually would get better have helped you back then?
A.It did help me. When I was in high school I got involved in the fringe theater scene in Chicago, and I met some openly gay people. I could see that it got better, that they were happy and loved and supported. I saw with my own eyes that it got better.
Q.Have you heard from any teenagers yet since posting the first video this week?
A.I’ve heard from bunches. I’ve gotten 3,000 e-mails in the first 24 hours. The ones that are really moving are the ones from straight kids who are telling me that they are e-mailing the link to their picked-on gay classmates and friends who need to see it.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Son Week
YOUR SON WILL HOLD YOUR HAND FOR ONLY A LITTLE WHILE, BUT WILL HOLD YOUR
HEART FOR A LIFETIME ♥♥ IT'S "SON WEEK"--IF YOU HAVE A SON WHO MAKES
YOUR LIFE WORTH LIVING BY JUST BEING AROUND HIM, AND YOU ARE PROUD OF
HIM
HEART FOR A LIFETIME ♥♥ IT'S "SON WEEK"--IF YOU HAVE A SON WHO MAKES
YOUR LIFE WORTH LIVING BY JUST BEING AROUND HIM, AND YOU ARE PROUD OF
HIM
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